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PREPARE ENRICH (Customized Version) Training

Thursday, February 25th, 2016

prepare-enrichTaught by:

Dale R. Doty, Ph.D.
User and Trainer in PREPARE for over 30 years

All Training Materials Provided:

PREPARE/ENRICH Manual and Resources

PREPARE/ENRICH Sample Computer Report

Complimentary Online Scoring

User Friendly Feedback Materials You Receive With Each Scoring:

Couple’s Workbook

Schedule Date and Registration Information:

Friday April 15, 2016

Held at Christian Family Institute (space limited)
6846 S. Canton Ave. Tulsa Oklahoma
8:30 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. (Lunch on Your Own)

Register Here

Cost: $195.00 Which Includes All Materials Necessary to be Certified
$245 for spouses to attend (material shared)
Contact: Christian Family Institute with Questions
(918) 745-0095

Deadline: April 15, 2016 (space limited)
6 CEUs LMFT/LPC

CFI on Mental Health

Tuesday, September 8th, 2015

Greg Pittman, minister at Cedar Ridge Christian Church, interviews Dr. Dale Doty & Eric Clements on mental illness and how the church should play a part in mental health of individuals and families.

Insights into Depression

Wednesday, June 24th, 2015

BIBLICAL INSIGHTShead-196541_640

Christians sometimes have the mistaken notion that they are immune from depression, and that depression is a result of failure in their Christian walk. This may not be the true as there are many causes of depression as we have indicated above.

The Bible records many examples of depression in God’s people. David repeatedly experienced depression (Psalms 43, 69, 88, and 102). Job, Moses, and Jonah of the Old Testament all experienced depression. Elijah, following the greatest victory recorded in the scripture on Mt. Carmel, sat under a broom tree and prayed to die (I Kings 19:4).

Scripture indicates “the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, . . . (Gal. 5:22).” It is God’s desire that we experience peace and joy, the opposite of depression. Phillipians 4:8 gives us a prescription for our negative thoughts. We are told to think on the things that are true, honest, lovely, excellent, virtuous and worthy of praise.

Comfort may be found in the scripture as clients are helped to realize that depression affects even the greatest of God’s heroes of faith. Faith and hope produce the opposite of hopelessness and contribute to recovery.

For clients experiencing separation from God, unforgiveness, or unrepentant sin, submission to Christ’s Lordship may produce healing and restore joy. For clients who have distorted notions of who God is, or what the Bible teaches, instruction and correction of faulty notions may increase a sense of hopefulness and healthy self esteem.

PSYCHOLOGICAL INSIGHTS

Psychological theories and research also give us insight into depression. We know that changes in brain chemistry take place in the person who is depressed. For some patients, those changes occur in response to medical disorders. In other cases, brain chemistry may be altered by stress, and thoughts of hopelessness, helplessness, and self-depreciation.

For the person whose depression is primarily caused by negative thoughts, cognitive therapy has been proven to be effective. Cognitive therapy is the application of behavioral and self management techniques to assist clients to change their thought-life which in turn affects emotions. The theory behind cognitive psychology is that emotions result from thoughts. As one changes their thoughts in conformity with a positive Biblical perspective, depression often disappears.

When depression is related to family and marital problems, marriage and family therapy may produce relief. This therapy may be directed at improving conflict resolution and communication skills, and may facilitate negotiation between family members. Some patients have unresolved conflicts going back to their family upbringing. Helping people look at the origins of their depression, bitterness, and anger may lead to forgiveness and reconciliation.

For those experiencing reactive depression due to loss, life stress, or change, emotional support and encouragement may speed recovery. “And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone (1 Thes. 5:14).

– Dale Doty, Ph.D.

(Additional articles on depression.)

Causes of Depression

Thursday, May 14th, 2015

Depressed womanDepression may be caused by one or more factors. One factor contributing to depression is a bio-chemical or other medical disorder. These may include a genetic predisposition toward depression as evidenced by a family history of depression. Medical disorders such as multiple sclerosis, chronic pain, blood sugar disorders such as hypoglycemia, cancer and hormonal imbalances have also been known to contribute to depression. Depression may result from the side affects of some prescribed medications, or from the abuse of substances such as alcohol or illicit drugs.

Cognition plays a major role in depression. Faulty thoughts, hopelessness, helplessness, and self-depreciating thoughts significantly increase vulnerability to depression.

Family factors such as marital discord, lack of intimacy, spouse abuse, problems in raising children, and unresolved conflict may contribute to depression. Learning the role in the family of being helpless and sick may also contribute to depression. Depression may result from other forms of family dysfunction such as incest, chemical dependency in a family member, neglect, or abandonment.

Misdirected anger can cause depression. Inability to manage anger, thoughts full of revenge, bitterness toward others, or a sense of feeling abused may contribute to depression. In addition, anger directed at self, self-punishment, and self-blame over past failures or sin may produce depression.

Spiritual causes of depression include separation from God, emptiness resulting from a failure to come to a knowledge of God, unforgiveness toward oneself or others, unrepentant sin, and faulty theology. Distortion in Biblical doctrine can lead a person to hopelessness, i.e. believing one has committed the unpardonable sin, salvation by works, etc.

Regarless of the cause, you don’t have to live with depression.  We can help.  Call 918-745-0095 to schedule an appointment today.

Dale Doty, Ph.D.

(Additional articles on depression.)

How Many Kinds of Depression Are There?

Thursday, May 7th, 2015

depressionThere are many different types of depression. We will look at four major categories of depression.

Brief reactive depression. This type of depression is often known as grief, and occurs in response to a variety of losses including the loss of a loved one, friend, the loss of a job, the loss of physical health, a major financial set-back, or a response to life changes such as a promotion. Reactive depression, or grief, may initially be severe with symptoms gradually lessening over time. A significant loss such as the death of a child, or unexpected divorce, may take people up to two years to recover significant levels of functioning. Reactive depression may include sad mood, anger, and any of the other depressive symptoms listed above.

Major Depression. Major depressive episodes are severe and incapacitating. During major depression people are often unable to function at school, work, or take care of responsibilities. Major depression can be triggered by stressful events or significant loss. Major depression can be categorized as mild, moderate, severe, or severe with psychotic features. During a major depressive episode the mood is significantly more depressed and there is a significant increase in symptoms over a person’s normal pattern. Generally during a major depression, clients do not experience good days. Once a person recovers from a major depressive episode, they may never experience depression again, or the depression may be recur.

Dysthymia (Chronic Low Grade Depression). Dysthymia is often characterized by poor self-esteem, self-depreciation, guilt, hopelessness, worry, and helplessness. Symptoms may also include any of the others symptoms from the checklist above. Dysthymia is generally a chronic condition lasting for many months to an entire lifetime. Generally symptoms of dysthymia are less severe than major depression. There may be good periods, but these are generally of short duration.

Bipolar (Manic-Depressive) Disorder. In manic depressive episodes there are wide mood swings that include severe symptoms of depression as indicated above, with alternating periods of manic behavior. Symptoms of a manic episode include:

  • a significantly elevated mood
  • symptoms of extremely high self-esteem or grandiosity
  • decreased need for sleep
    being more talkative than usual, difficulty being quiet
  • extreme distractibility
  • difficulty controlling extreme and excessive urges to: spend money, engage in sexual behavior, or other out of control behaviors

In order to be diagnosed with manic-depressive disorder, a person must have experienced alternating periods of severe depression and manic behavior or mood. For some people with manic-depressive disorder, the mood may switch from extreme depression to extremely elevated mood in just a few minutes. For other people with manic-depressive disorder, the mood swing from extreme low to extreme high may take months or years with periods of relative normal functioning in between.

Often the client experiencing a manic episode does not recognize that there is anything abnormal about their mood or behavior. They report “feeling good.” Family members are the most distressed and recognize that something is wrong.

Getting Help With Depression. Help starts with a clear diagnosis.  We need to understand which type of depression you have in order to come up with an effective action plan. Call today (918-745-0095) and we can help you start the process to overcome depression.

Dale Doty, PH.D.

(Additional articles on depression can be found here.)

Premarital Counseling With the PREPARE/ENRICH Customized Version

Tuesday, March 4th, 2014

Christian Family Institute has been training mental health professionals, pastors, and lay counselors to do premarital counseling for over 30 years.  We are strong believers that such premarital preparation can improve relationships and reduce divorce rates.  One tool CFI commonly employs to strengthen relationships and marriages before they begin is the PREPARE/ENRICH assessment inventory.

I look back at the old versions of this test and am amazed at the changes that it has undergone over these many years.  I first met Dr. David Fournier, an early developer of the inventory in 1977 when he was pilot testing PREPARE in Kansas City.  Little did I know how significant our relationship would later be, and what an important role PREPARE would serve in our work.

This last year, PREPARE underwent another major revision.  It is now going to be known as PREPARE/ENRICH Customized version, instead of PREPARE 2000.  Several major changes in the instrument are immediately apparent.  One change is that all the instruments are combined.  Another change is that this version can only be taken by computer.  When a counselor agrees with a couple to utilize this version, a private login account is established allowing the parties to take the inventory online.  The initial items inquire into the status of the couple’s relationship, such as whether they are engaged, living together, or married.  Other items inquire about age and other factors.  The answers to these questions determine which banks of questions are relevant and will be administered to the couple.  Each couple takes a “custom” version of the assessment.

The outcome results are immediately obvious.  Separate reports are generated for counselors (“facilitators”) and couples.  Reports include a massive amount or information about the couple and their relationship, no matter what stage of relationship the couple may be in.  This enables couples to make important informed decisions, including commitments to grow and change.

Another important aspect of the PREPARE/ENRICH inventories is the increased emphasis on interactive feedback and therapeutic exercises.  For those trained in this approach, tools for helping couples grow are immediately available to meet the couple’s needs.

CFI will be providing workshops to train new users of the PREPARE/ENRICH Customized Version, and to update those already trained in PREPARE 2000.  Watch CFI’s website for dates and times.  Also, check out the Life Innovations website for more information.

by Dale R. Doty, M.S.W., Ph.D.

To sign up for Dr. Dale Doty’s PREPARE/ENRICH training workshop on Friday, March 28, 2014 please click here.

What Should I Do When My (Adult) Children Are Getting Married?

Tuesday, April 9th, 2013

The quality of relationship you have with your adult children will often determine how much counsel your children will accept from you.  It is important not to rush to judgments or counsel BEFORE you have earned the right to speak.  Rushed judgments or counsel before it is welcome can permanently damage relationships with our adult children and their future spouse.

BE VERY SLOW TO EXPRESS ANY DISAPPROVAL YOU MIGHT FEEL.  The key here is that this is an ADULT child, now capable of making independent decisions.  If they already have their mind made up, expressing disapproval make only serve to damage the relationship you have with your adult child.  Mistakes made at this phase of life can effect future relationships for the rest of your life.

Any negative opinions you might express toward your adult child’s chosen spouse will likely get back to them.  Your disapproval may offend, damage trust, and cause your child’s future spouse to pull away.  If your adult child goes ahead and marries this person, they may never like or trust you, or allow you into their life.

Consider the gift of pre-marital counseling to your adult children considering marriage.  A comprehensive assessment of the strengths and weaknesses of a planned marriage, offered by a trained and objective professional, may carry more weight than your own opinion.  Further, this gives your adult children the counseling or therapy they may need to get their relationship on firm ground.

Dale Doty, M.S.W., Ph.D.

Dale Doty, Ph.D.

 

What Do You Need to Know Before You Marry Again?

Monday, February 25th, 2013

StickFIgureFamilyA frequently observed pattern is for those who remarry to repeat the mistakes from their previous failed marriage.  Second marriages are even more likely to fail than first marriages.  This occurs far too often, yet there are things that can be done to prevent it.

It is extremely important to gain some understanding and insight into what we may have contributed to the failure of our earlier marriage(s).  It is never so simple as to have been entirely the blame of our first spouse that a previous marriage ended.  If we do not have understanding and insight, we cannot take the necessary responsibility in order to correct past mistakes, and therefore, not repeat the same mistakes.

Marriages end due to many factors, including rushing into a marriage without an adequate courtship period to get to know the person we are marrying, not knowing our partner’s history and character, rushing into sexual intimacy, failing to be prepared for the demands of marriage, not being financially secure, failing to manage anger and other emotions, not knowing how to communicate well or resolve conflicts, just to mention a few.

Counseling is an important experience in getting help understanding how a past marriage failed.  It can make the difference between a failed or successful second marriage.  Pre-marriage counseling is also a very important experience, to insure that future relationships are on track to becoming a successful marriage.  Premarriage counseling should begin as soon as possible after the first talk of a life together for the future.

The Bible speaks of the importance of the “safety in a multitude of counselors,” (Proverbs 11:14), and that we should walk in wise counsel (Proverbs 12:15, Proverbs 19:20).”  Making important decisions on our own without counsel increases the odds of our making an error in judgment.

Dale Doty, M.S.W., Ph.D.

Dale Doty, Ph.D.

Holiday Family Challenges

Monday, November 12th, 2012

The holidays are stressful in many ways.  The increase in activities, shopping, travel, and extra costs are only the beginning of the list of stressors.   Holidays are also filled with increased family stressors, such as:

–       Increased family expectations to spend time together

–       Pressure to conform to family traditions

–       Seeing family members who may be kept at arms-length during the rest of the year

–       Reminders of family members who have died

–       Exposure to increased alcohol consumption among some family members

–       Children spending time out of school and at home

–       Reminders of family hurts and disappointments

–       Increased dealings with extended family and in-laws

Even the healthiest of families contain personalities and family members whose personal values clash, or where some family members’ behavior is difficult to be near. These pressures contribute to breakdowns in communication and increased conflict.

We strive to establish comfortable levels of distance and boundaries during the year.  This often collapses around the holidays when we change our routines and increase contact with our extended family.  Intrusions and offenses increase.  Occasionally, these gatherings result in conflict that includes unpleasant escalations and hurtful words.

Though it is probably impossible for most of us to eliminate family stresses and conflicts altogether, there are some ways to reduce stress.  Consider some of the following options:

–       Parents, prior to making holiday plans, can reconsider and re-negotiate what is best for their family, rather than simply doing the same things that have been expected in the past.

  • When visiting conflict-prone family members, make visits shorter
  • When traveling out of town, consider motels rather than cramming large numbers of people into small spaces.  This also allows for some private times to de-stress.
  • Some family confrontations are predictable.  It’s okay to intentionally plan to avoid unproductive and vulnerable situations.
  • When stressors and conflicts are building during a visit, go for a walk or a drive with safe people to decompress.

–        When unresolved conflicts with family members can be identified in advance, be pro-active.  Consider your best conflict-resolution skills and plan to use them in advance of holiday get-togethers.  When you have made your best effort to seek peace with problem family members and it hasn’t worked, consider consulting an expert on family conflict.  They may be able to suggest tools you may not have considered, or they may be able to mediate civil conversations (at CFI we frequently mediate conflicts over the holidays and any time during the year.)

–       If you have lost a significant family member recently, make time to celebrate and honor that person.  Do it in a way that is most meaningful to you.

–       Make the reason for the season central to your family get-togethers.  Christmas is about Christ and His great gift of His life to us through his birth on earth.  Even when surrounded by others who may not share your faith, renew your own celebration of Christ with those who do share your faith.  Pick out verses from scripture that speak to your situation and that assist you to have a fresh perspective and renewed mind, such as:

  • Regarding Christmas:
    • The Christmas Story from Matthew 1
  • The importance of married people setting limits with family:
    • Genesis 2:24 (NIV)  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
  • Dealing With Anger and Conflict:
    • Proverbs 15:1  (NLTSE)  A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.
    • Proverbs 18:13 (MSG)  Answering before listening is both stupid and rude.
    • Romans 12:18 (NIV)  If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
    • Proverbs 22:24 (NIV)  Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered,
  • The Goal To Love:
    • Ephesians 4:15 (NLTSE) Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church.
    • I Tim. 1:5 The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.
    • I Cor. 13:4-8 (NIV) [4] Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. [5] It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. [6] Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. [7] It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.[8] Love never fails.
  • We, like Jesus, need time to reflect, refresh, and pray:
    • Mark 1:35 (NIV)  Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.
  • Finding Peace in Even the Most Stressful  Circumstances:
    • Phil. 4:4-8 [4] Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! [5] Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. [6] Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. [7] And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.[8] Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. [9] Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Merry Christ-mas!

Dale R. Doty, Ph.D.

February and March Speaking Engagements

Tuesday, February 7th, 2012

CFI staff have a number of upcoming events in February and March

Dr. Tim Doty will be speaking at Metro Christian Academy as a part of their Spiritual Life series for parents Staying Connected to Our Kids: An interactive workshop series to help parents stay engaged in their kids’ lives as they mature.  Open to any parent in the greater Tulsa area.  Panel workshops will take place twice on February 13th, 11:30am-1pm, and again 7pm-8:30pm at Metro Christian Academy.  See the Staying Connected to Our Kids (pdf flyer).

 

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On February 19th, Dr. Tim will be speaking alongside Pastor Brad Jenkins at The Gathering in Tulsa for the second installment of a series called “Love Machine.”  Dr. Doty will be sharing about how singles, couples, long-time married, newly married, divorced and combined families can employ healthy relationship principles.

7370 E. 71st St. Tulsa, OK 74133

10:30am

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Dr. Tim will also be speaking at Brookhaven Hospital on  March 7 from 11:30am-1pm. “Deepen Your Clinical Effectiveness: The Use of Psychological and Forensic Assessments in Your Practice.”

201 South Garnett Road

Tulsa, OK 74128-1800

Reservations: 918-438-4257

CEU Credits: 1.5 hours each, available to local professionals.

 

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Dr. Dale Doty will be hosting a Certification Training for the PREPARE/ENRICH tool on Friday, March 30, 2012

This workshop is being offered specifically for pastors, pastoral or lay counselors, chaplains, marriage educators, and deacons or elders. Professional counselors & counselors-in-training are also welcome to attend.  6.0 CEU hours approved for LMFT / LPC.

If you would like additional information about the PREPARE/ENRICH tool and the training we offer, please take a look at Dr. Doty’s article and video.

To sign up for the workshop, and for additional details, here is the link to the registration page.