Everything I always wanted to know about Christmas as a Jewish child but was afraid to ask my Rabbi:

1. If Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, why do so many people get depressed?
2. Does it cost more to celebrate Christmas than Chanuka?
3. Do I have to believe in Santa Claus in order to become a Christian?
4. Why do some Gentiles make such a big deal about Christmas and never even go to church?
5. Why pay retail when everything goes on sale next week?
6. Why do Gentiles celebrate with alcohol at parties in preparation for such a holy day?
7. Why do Gentiles try so hard all year long to keep house plants alive, then go buy a dead tree and cover it with things that don’t grow on trees?
8. Why do Jewish store owners sing “What a friend we have in Jesus”?
9. Why are there so many Christmas carols that don’t mention Christ?
10. Why does Santa Claus think he’s God? (He knows when you are sleeping and awake, bad and good!)

Written by William Berman, Ph.D.